We live in a society of convenient socialists. You know, the ones who remind you ‘how aloof you have been lately’ when you deny a party invitation. Suddenly, your age becomes a barrier in your social chemical reaction, while you’re subjected to the criticism of “God. You’re old”
Increasingly, more often than not, today’s new age generation has epiphanies of how ‘life is so short and we must live to our fullest’. Enters the self-indulgent race or as you call it the ‘YOLO’ bandwagon. The ones who are unapologetic about their achievements and desires.
Everything, from leaving the home alone and ending up at a random host’s house with twenty other strangers to rallying and objecting the policies of the government, we are not afraid of anything. We believe in standing up for our rights in, and out of our homes, to supporting the flaw flaunting of our fellow strugglers, we are the extremist of the races on the face of this earth.
The constant neck-lowered, finger pressing on screens to spitting abuses on roadside eve teasing criminals, we have become the always online generation. As much as an “I’m not on Facebook” comment lands you in an at least ten-minute follow up a conversation.
“The highlighted discussion being “how do you connect with people?” (Ironic, ha)
See that’s the question, people today, are hardly connecting, in contrast to they are merely indulging. I will indulge in you as far as I don’t need to take responsibility. Starting from the changing dynamics of the opposite gender relationships to the juvenile corporate employees, they will care for the other only till their needs and intentions are met. How one perceives the bigger picture is mostly about one track destination of the Me, Myself and I syndrome.
I also have a theory, that anyone who has been a part of your life for over 8 years and ones whom you met a year ago and still like to interact with, on an (average) daily basis, can never be your true companions (or friends).
“The increasing social dependency of people on people, for as much as taking a walk, is not a projection of a compassionate world, but is rooted deep in the insecurities of people being left alone.”
From the moment we are pushed out of the womb, to the moment we start actively getting our will in order, the human mind and body registers many faces, makes many solid relationships, changes a few of these people, is rejected by many others and somewhere along the way, learns the importance of self-worth and self-care.
There will be no other if there is not proper me.
We have all missed opportunities or taken them, to fulfil a part of our personal fantasy. The job you quit on your first day, the boyfriend you made for a day because he was the first guy who ever asked you out, though you never liked him, the party you went to because it served wine and also that girl you liked might just be there, the college you attended because for years people will be impressed with the mention of its brand name and the job you took because hello, student loans!
“We are the ultimate supporters of each other. We comment, tweet and love each other’s pictures but we also secretly hope you never got that promotion because now you get to see the world while they gave ‘others’ the boots.”
We also all have that one (or many) friend(S) who are insecure because you are not only confident with your flaws but actually display them with pride. The ones who congratulate you in office when you get selected for that international conference, but silently wait for the next one so they can trip you over and shine themselves. Or the ones who say “am so happy for you” but their face says “You don’t really deserve that success” or the “good-looking” guy you dated. This ‘Us vs Them’ approach to social-connection is a deterrent for making lasting commitments in life to people, no matter who they are.
People today don’t have the option of No in their life. If you decline, you’re immediately replaced with a much looser or “indulgent” version of you. So much so, if you don’t subside to alcohol, time wastage, or toxic ways of socializing, you are not worth socializing with altogether. Or vice versa.
It’s sad, how the failure of someone else might define our success and how stepping over people, like building blocks, satisfies the souls of those who themselves feed off others for companionship. If you have been tagged as a “loner” or a distant observer, you’re lucky. For what shines bright, is not always the desired diamond.
“Focus on yourself, for others definitely are focusing on you.”